Residence Of A Soul

A soul may be…

happy, crushed, sad, numb, broken.

None or all at one time or another.

It may feel as a heavy rock, pulling down

To the bottom of an ocean,

But this ocean is bottomless,

The final destination unknown…

Other times,

The place where we, humans, decide souls go,

Is in a better place,

Or  worse,

Depending on …

what we, as individuals, believe in.

Upon the death of my friend, I had a vision

I cannot see anything,

Rather imagine,

Standing on the edge of a precipice,

at the very edge of it, staring down.

I hope to see into the depth of the place

Where  souls might reside,

and find hers.

What if I loose my emotional balance,

And step forward into the endless precipice,

Where I think  souls find peace?

A passing thought!

Instead, I take two steps back,

In the reality and safety of the Now.

I continue to contemplate and question:

Where do souls reside?

When the time comes,

I wish my soul will be pulverized

In a million particles, so small,

They could enter the hearts of the ones I love.

I know, they will not see it, but feel my presence.

When they do,

I hope they will allow my soul

To rest next to theirs…

before the wind blows it away into eternity…

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Trash Day!!!

Love, as deep as the Ocean,

The bottom of which no one sees.

Yet I trust

It exists!

I close my eyes,

Breathe in slowly

And question my feelings:

Is there an end to Motherly love?

Layer upon layer are being peeled,

To reveal the Infinite.

“You MUST HIT  ROCK BOTTOM

Of all Motherly Loves,”

The Wise One says,

“Then, you will understand!”

Words are being thrown

Into the Mother’s  heart!

They disappear slowly and

Leave no trace!

The knives are swallowed,

The heart closes.

Millions of knives are being felt,

Locked in the darkness

Of  a confused, devastated,

Motherly heart…

“LOOK!!!” says the Wise one,

While the shinny coins overflow her pockets,

“Look, we could see NOTHING!!!”

Therefore nothing exists…

Aim knives at your Mother’s heart…

The one who birthed you,

And nursed you days and nights on end!

If the wound is smooth and the knives no more,

The chapter ended…

On 1400793107583 careful examination,

It  smells…

A magnifying glass reveals

Maggots.

Tomorrow is

TRASH DAY!

Invisible, who cares that

Your Mother’s heart is in

Excruciating pain?

Too Much Love…

May be the coins in her pockets didn’t overflow fast enough
To show the world her value.
May be the proof of the superficial wasn’t demonstrated clear enough
To make an unquestionable, immediate difference.
Thankfully, the mission was accomplished after all:
The pockets were filled to the brim, and that was all it mattered:
For the world to admire her riches,
Her undeniable assurance of perfection,
Peace of mind, happiness, and
Ultimately, the magic of turning tarnish into spotless, and more…
As if nothing ever happened!

Is this the end of a dream…
Nightmare?
Eyes wide open, heart racing…
Could love be bought? Whose love? Whose pockets? Somebody’s, anybody’s,
Mine, yours, ours…

Love as profound as the Ocean,
Its bottom so far down,
I can’t see it,
But I know it exists.
Faith assures me it does,
Yet I test!
Eyes wide open, holding my breath,
I question my own love…
There is a beginning to motherly love,
But is there an end?

I think I reached the bottom,
Yet, I didn’t!
More time goes by, less pain I feel.

The million knives which penetrated my heart,
Have been absorbed.
My heart closed and locked them forever
In the darkness of my confused, devastated
Motherly heart…

‘Look,’ the Adviser whisperd, while pressing down into her pockets
The shining coins, to make space for more…
‘Look, how smooth your mother’s heart looks!
It is completely healed! A perfectly smooth heart, not even a scratch!’

Later, upon the dissection of the
Perfectly smooth heart,
A million sharp knives were extracted,
Cleaned and reused on other motherly hearts!

The adviser smiled;
The satisfaction of a job well done!
After all, it’s about shinny coins, not
How one earns them!

———-
Tomorrow is trash day,
What’s left of this Mother’s heart will disappear forever… or will it?