The Party, The Guests and The Host!

We were in Bucharest, Romania, when Eastern Europe was communist.

We had just turned eighteen, my high school boyfriend and I and with the wisdom typical of that age group, we eloped and got married!

Shortly after, still enveloped in our “daze of independence” we were hopping from party to party, especially on weekends.

One Saturday evening, we were invited to a party in an apartment complex where several of our friends lived. On the outside, the complex was grey, gloomy. The main entrances and windows looked desolate but there was a lot of life and happiness once the doors to the apartments’ opened…

We rang the bell to our friend’s apartment, where the party was about to start. It was a little early, so when another guest, a mutual friend of ours and the host’s, opened his door, we were relieved she had arrived at the party before us!

She smiled a little surprised. She probably didn’t know we were invited at this party. That was okay… I smiled back, reassuringly.The three of us sat on a sofa and chatted, as we waited for the Host who was probably finishing up in the kitchen.

I launched into telling a story to avoid the silence. My throat was dry. Where are the drinks? I wondered. Where was the Host? How rude, to have a guest open the door to his apartment and have guests entertain one another! He really shouldn’t have a party if he is such a poor Host!!!

The friend who opened the door for us fidgeted increasingly.
No wonder, I thought, she is nervous! Doesn’t know how to handle this embarrassing situation. To try and entertain us, when she, herself is a guest! She and the Host, barely knew each other. I fact, we barely knew him. The Host had some nerve to be unprepared and let guests entertain themselves…

I glanced at my watch. It was getting late. Where were the other guests?

My husband and I “exchanged meaningful looks.”

The conversation continued to dragged. Our friend barely answered my questions about the weather any more… She didn’t seem to care my forecast was rain!

After about half an hour, in desperation, I flattered her:

“How nice of you to open the door for us!”

“Oh you’re welcome, but now I have to leave.” she said and stood up.


“I don’t mean to be rude,” she continued,” but wasn’t expecting you… at my apartment. I was going out when you rang the bell. Going to “X” party, on the 3rd floor.”

… and you know what followed:)

Oh… well thank God we were all invited. Over the years this became a treasured memory of how foolish we were and yet survived!

Happily Ever After:
The three of us took the elevator to the third floor, rang the door bell and the right Host opened the right door to the right apartment. After all, there was a party and the door opened at last! There were drinks too!

Many thanks to Karen Salmansohn’s post “If it does not open, it’s not your door (xo which was posted on my Home Feed, on Facebook and triggered my memory and desire to share this true story from my youth.

The Bachelorette’s Finalle 2015… am I really watching it?

The Bachelor, followed by its female counterpart, The Bachelorette, because, let’s face it, the shows have been successful and millions have been watching both for years! Why? Why not!

Years ago, when my young adult daughter mentioned college parties built around watching these shows I thought, really? and I kept it a secret!

Years went by, and here I was this season re-descovering The Bachelorette! Oh! The plot got complex over the year, the drama, the sex behind doors that close in our face! The honest tears and desperation exhibited by Kaitlyn, given the seriousness of the problem. Hey, it must be really hard to have dates in exotic places at the unlimited expense of ABC, because let’s face it, millions watch it and I, among them!

To top it all, I am writing about it! What is wrong with me? Well… it’s like therapy. I have to get it out of my system.

Kaitlyn had to make the life-shattering choice: Nick or Shawn?
Nick was the guy with the “preexisting relationship,” like a health “pre-existing condition,” but he got to have sex with her and really fell in love… or lust? No matter which way one looked it, the cliche, “it’s complicated,” applied!

This is a spontanious post! I had to write or risk insomnia! I decided to post when I watched Nick, heart broken, leaving Kaitlyn, who had just unexpectedly rejected him… He stared at the “rejected diamond ring,” and I thought, “he probably had to return it to some famous jewelry store.” Oh NO! Suddenly he threw the ring! Where did it go? Could I have it and pay my debts? Was it fake? Did Shawn may be, just may be, found it and proposed?

I will never know! Darn!
However, as in all good soaps, Shawn was the ONE AND ONLY and I am convinced they will live happily ever after.

The show is still on, as I am writing this post, but they are all just “coming to terms” with life’s real tragedies. I hope they will survive! ūüôā

As for me, I am debating whether to watch one of my favorite Mexican soap operas. At least they have the advantage to be subtitled and I LOVE the sound of the Spanish language!

Internet Dating – A Woman’s Perspective

On July 31, 2013, on this blog I published “Internet Dating-A Woman’s Perspective- The Man from Ghana.
Since then, the article was read by hundreds of people around the world. What follows may be considered Part II of the July 31, 2013 post, and as everything written on The Nude Truth, this story is true.

It seems to be cyclical, every two years, my curiosity to discover what is happening out there, in the internet “dating” world. This time, I started my research with the clear goal to learn, so that I could write an informed post to help others and see the humor in what is happening in the internet dating world. The Ghana man experience from 2013 was enough. As they say, “fool me once, fool me twice…”

I was online for a total of 7 days before I deleted my profile. In one week, I received 161 “views,” 93 “likes,” and 47 messages.

Before I joined a couple of sites, I Googled:
Top Internet Dating Sites, and the search produced five sites. Among them, and OKCupid, etc.

I checked out several other paid sites, not listed in the top five, which advertised “free memberships,” but in reality, a “free profile,” was not made public until one paid! Not that free, after all.

Still, it helped me determine an important fact: I checked out a few men and women’s profiles. What struck me was that most women desired a relationship within 10 to 50 miles from their homes, while the men wanted long distance relationships, ranging from 700 miles to 3,000! The conclusion is yours!

The top five sites, each, had clients’ ratings listed next to them and the most ratings were given by OKCupid, which is a free dating site, on which one could use their Facebook account to sign up. Easy and your privacy is guaranteed…

I signed up on OK Cupid, which was free.
Within minutes, I received so many messages that I had to turn off my laptop, take a deep breathe and relax, or rather focus on reality: Who were all these people? Was I THAT attractive? Really!!!
To mind came the women on the Dr. Phil Show, who sent hundreds of thousands of dollars to men they never met, outside the USA.
Well, that would not me, definitely, as I have difficulty comprehending the concept of someone becoming destitute believing in the illusion of so called “love…”

How could one fall in love with a picture? A Voice? How about chemistry? My definition of chemistry is one reaches out and shakes a hand, gets a hug. A direct, undeniable attraction between two people. Still, people do fall in love with the idea of love, and sadly, despite the clear warnings on ALL DATING SITES, to not send money abroad or to people one meets on the Internet, people still repeat the mistake!

Anyway, what have I experienced during this one week adventure on the internet dating scene?

At least 1/4 were men who presented profiles featuring pictures of themselves (may be, but I doubt) their child or children or an older parent. I guess the idea was, they cared. they were good family men.
90% of those with whom I exchanged messages told me they were widowed and were single parents. It was painful and hard!!!

The initial profiles stated they were in the United States, but after a second email exchange, they “entrusted” me with a secret: THEY WERE ON A SPECIAL MISSION, ABROAD!!!

All, wanted to take the chat off the dating site and offered Facebook accounts, to friend me and chat. I insisted on me getting their information, which they were happy to oblige.

I checked out one Facebook account. A “pilot!” Yes, you read it correctly. An Air Force officer, putting his life out on a limb for you and I! Wow! How lucky could a woman get after being on line less than 48 hours?LOL
On a thorough examination of his Facebook account, it became clear he started the FB account a few months ago and, how silly is this? On the public timeline, there were messages from various women stating how much they missed him, as he was in the air, I guess…

What else? Oh, yes! The profiles were written in good English but as the back and forth emails started, the more they wrote, the worse their English became. It must have been the anxiety of finding love!

After three days of figuring out the “outside of the USA segment,” I wrote a paragraph on my profile, under the Heading, WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR LIFE? (my life, that was!)
I stated, the one thing I was not doing was interested in overseas relationships.
The overseas secret mission people stopped emailing me!

A much smaller, local segment continued to write. The only one which I would mention, was a man who wrote:

“I am a former intelligent, Intelligence Agent… etc” Then he told me he was also a pilot and had his own plane and was just about to go “take off for an hour or so, just to be in the air,” but what HE didn’t know, was the web site showed me every time someone checked my profile. So, while he was “in the air,” the dating site alerted me he was checking my profile. It was funny, but forgivable, since he stated from the beginning, he was “FORMER INTELLIGENT.”

I was tempted to keep going for a while, but the local pilot, asked a question which determined me to end the budding relationship and delete my account.

He asked: Do you own or rent? Is it an apartment, or a house?
How was this his business? Was he fishing for free housing? Oh… may be he wanted to buy me a house and I missed the opportunity!

So… I guess this is all for now. If you wish to receive free tips to improve your daily living, please follow us by signing up in the email box to the right.

We ALWAYS appreciate your comments and shares of experiences. This is how we all learn and better our lives and do it in a light, humorous way.

Best wishes for a lovely weekend!

Residence Of A Soul

A soul may be…

happy, crushed, sad, numb, broken.

None or all at one time or another.

It may feel as a heavy rock, pulling down

To the bottom of an ocean,

But this ocean is bottomless,

The final destination unknown…

Other times,

The place where we, humans, decide souls go,

Is in a better place,

Or  worse,

Depending on …

what we, as individuals, believe in.

Upon the death of my friend, I had a vision

I cannot see anything,

Rather imagine,

Standing on the edge of a precipice,

at the very edge of it, staring down.

I hope to see into the depth of the place

Where  souls might reside,

and find hers.

What if I loose my emotional balance,

And step forward into the endless precipice,

Where I think  souls find peace?

A passing thought!

Instead, I take two steps back,

In the reality and safety of the Now.

I continue to contemplate and question:

Where do souls reside?

When the time comes,

I wish my soul will be pulverized

In a million particles, so small,

They could enter the hearts of the ones I love.

I know, they will not see it, but feel my presence.

When they do,

I hope they will allow my soul

To rest next to theirs…

before the wind blows it away into eternity…



Motherhood IS FOREVER!!! A Mother’s Day “SPECIAL”

This post is dedicated to motherhood, which is everyday, not only  one day in May.

For the last three weeks or longer, ¬†I have been unable to listen to, or watch anything on the media because of the non-stop ads about Mother’s Day gifts and making it sound as if everyone ever born (one thing is for sure, we ALL came of a Mother) is running to K- Jewelers to buy the “Open-Heart Collection,” or diamonds, or even better chocolates and diamonds. I switched channels but other channels told me stories of discounts for Mom.

My favorite, which made me turn off the TV, not just switch channels: Mom opens a LOT of presents under the watchful gaze of her also perfect daughter. Mom is clearly delighted, yet, she says:”You shouldn’t have!” but everyone knows better! She says that just because, by definition, mothers in TV commercials are PERFECT! That includes humble.

As the mother of two adult daughters raised here, in the world of “every kiss begins with K,” therefore the conclusion is go buy expensive diamonds from K-Jewelers, I have mixed feelings about Mother’s Day and the way we have been programmed to celebrate it, in line with all the other commercial holidays.

I also think of my own mother, no longer on Earth, but whom I will ALWAYS celebrate in MY HEART.

I am thinking back to my childhood, in Romania ¬†where we didn’t have Mother’s Day. So… lacking a randomly (or may be not so randomly) chosen Day to show appreciation for my mother, I showed my love and respect every day, in small but significant ways, as she was aging and fighting cancer.

In my culture, respect for a mother was not a one day deal, but a life-long responsibility, which was not doubted or questioned or commercialized.

We had the knowledge in our DNA that our mothers brought us into this world, nursed us, raised us, were by our side in all major life events, good and bad. Somehow we also knew that our moms were not perfect but they did the best they could with what they had at that moment. We knew somehow without anyone preaching us, what to do to honor our mothers every day when their turn came to be shown love.

Commercials set aside, parties forgotten, please remember every day that without your MOM, there would be NO YOU.

Celebrate motherhood everyday, because ¬†mothers don’t feed us, kiss us and love us one day a year, but every breathing moment for as long as they live!

For me, as I will honor my own mother tomorrow, with the good and the bad times together, I wish all daughters would take a moment to reflect and open their hearts, not to buy from the “open heart collection,” but to simply say:

I love you Mom!”¬†20140910_124124

Dating After You Turn 50!

Dating  in any age group could be a challenge.

Each age group seeks something else from a “potential” partner.

I don’t know about you, but when I was a teenager, and as ALL teenagers I saw myself ¬†immortal and knew it all, I ignored all the advice given to me by those that “knew.” I eloped and got married! What were my needs at 18? Definitely sexual, as now, I know enough ¬†about the role hormones ¬†in our love decisions. Then, I thought it was “love.” Now I know it was “lust.”

When I turned 30 I was ¬†already divorced from the first “love of my life.”

In a new environment, I started dating and also reading every statistic in Women’s Magazines which assured me once a woman turned 30 her chances of finding a partner went down drastically. Hmm… bad news, but against the statistical odds, I re-married and we had two beautiful daughters. What were my needs at that time? I definitely knew I didn’t know it all, I also had different goals, such as having children with a trustworthy partner. Was sex still playing a great role? You bet! That’s how kids are conceived.

Years went by, the children grew up, the second “love of my life,” died, and here I was again, single and in my fifties…

Hmm… did I think I knew it all? No. Were my hormones raging to the point of confusing lust with love? No. Did I want to get pregnant and raise more children? Oh… well that would have been a miracle. No miracle happened.

On the other hand, after a few years of being by myself, and enjoying the company of my parrot and three dogs, I did consider starting to date again. What was I looking for?

Someone with a sense of humor, trustworthy and like-minded. Such as what? To like travel, shows and sometimes going out or having friends over. Oh! And to love ¬†children and dogs. Yes, this was a requirement, as I don’t trust people who don’t like children and animals. Call me prejudiced.

I thought ¬†this was a reasonable “wishful list,” as I was prepared to reciprocate everything I sought in a potential companion. I knew a good ¬†relationship is a two-way street and I only travel on this “type” of streets.

And… where was I going to find these ¬†“potential” men? I don’t go to bars, I don’t go to a church of single people… Thank God for internet dating sites, right?

I was soon to find out that the age groups I attracted were either much younger, looking for a “mama,” or someone to pay their bills, men my age who who were used to have sex on a first date, possibly in the back of a car, if it was spacious enough, or men 30 years older then me, who were on the verge of investing in the diaper industry.

After serious consideration, I gave up  looking for a male companion.

Why? Perhaps because I have learned valuable life lessons and ¬†in my fifties I looked for a soul connection, rather than a “must” have partner to satisfy the sexual needs I had at 18, or the need to have children, a status and a husband if we are 30 and still seeking that perfect partner.

My personal conclusion is that we are wiser and deeper after fifty.

We know not only what we need from another, but what we could realistically offer to a ¬†committed companion. We don’t have the need to get married or have children. In this age group the main need is for companionship, meaning and soul connection. Well, sex is a constant, in all age groups, but it gains a different meaning as we grow wiser, just as good wines get better with age.

Is it worth it to be selective? Which would you rather be? Alone, or rather “single,” with your friends, hobbies and pets, or not alone but lonely with the wrong companion?

The choice is ours.





…of starting again with hope,

when life is at its end.

…to pretend it’s never too late,

when I know it is.

…to climb in search of a sturdy rock,

when I know I walk on shifting sands.

…to smile,

when my heart cries.

…to pretend I’m strong,

when I’m weak inside.

..of looking alive,

When I’m dead.

Most of all, I am tired of an obsessive thought:

Do they not know,

or do they not care,