Law and Rules!

There are laws, and there are rules. Some serve us, some don’t…

A law is so to speak “written in stone” and hard to change. Rules are the “individual babies” of various institutions. “Babies” the leadership decided to vote in with the scope to boost the good functioning of the institution.

Recently, life forced me to reflect at a deeper level on the topic of laws and rules, as one specific “rule,” affected my life deeply and not in a positive way.

How many times have I heard that one thing or another could not happen, could not be done, because a law, from years before, prevented an action. An action, which under the new circumstances of our lives would have been beneficial to people. Yes, people, as in the very humans (or their grandchildren) who made the laws in the first place. Did it ever happen to you? This realization, made me question:

Do we make the laws or do they make us? Are we prisoners of our own laws?

Furthermore, knowing that the only certain thing in life is CHANGE, how could people change old laws  using a timely democratic system, to meet the present needs of the majority adequately?

Another, less permanent category, are new “rules” (not yet laws) made in principle to “improve the good functioning of a institution and serve its clients.”  The rules are made at local levels  and  at  surface they are made keeping in mind the benefits of the clients.

However,  a personal experience, forced me to look at a deeper level and made me question the true goals of a specific rule…This “rule” affected my life at a very personal level, at a time when I was counting on support and was paying for it.

On a superficial analysis,  the rule seemed  illogical, but on a deeper level, I thought the new rule was not made having in mind the clients’ benefits, but to boost profits to the institution as a primary goal. Hmm… what do the “wise ones” say?” FOLLOW THE MONEY!!!

Generally new rules have the hidden or explicit role to boost profits. Nothing wrong with it, but what if this is a health care facility, even worse, a mental health facility of great reputation. What if these apparently benign new rule, impacts  negatively the lives of people who are already affected by emotional problems? They had the need and the courage to  walk in the facility, answer endless questionnaires, put their most intimate problems on a plate and start treatment trusting their therapist and the system?   How about them? How about if the new rule disrupts a process already hard? What could be the consequences to the very people the facility is responsible to serve and help? I could only speak for myself…

This post might seem mysterious, as I do not name “names,” but the problem of  a rule made by a specific institution, affected me profoundly and  is at the core of what inspired this writing. Why I decided to write about it?

I made a commitment to JUSTICE  and TRUTH and am holding myself responsible to the promise I made:

Always write the NUDE TRUTH. I am still in a process of “discovery” and this post will have a follow up. It will have the same title (plus PART II.)

Meanwhile,  I’d appreciate your opinions on the basic question of laws and rules, who they serve and how could they be changed through a more expeditious democratic system when and if they cease to accomplish the very purpose for which they were made in the first place? Could you think of any such laws/rules, that affected you?

Happy thinking!



Reaching Your Goals! Three Simple Rules!

Do you make goals?  Do you follow steps?  Are your goals realistic?  If so, what is your inner motivation for the goal you made? 

Let’s take an example many would relate to: loosing weight!

1. Internal goals

If we decide to loose weight  to please our partner, is that our internal goal, or rather an action we feel forced to take to please another? As a rule, lasting results occur when we do something for ourselves and not for someone else.

2. Take steps, not leaps

If the goal is to loose 50 pounds, make it a realistic goal by planning to only loose a couple pounds a week over a long period of time.  You will reach your goal slowly but surely and permanently.

3. Make a realistic goal

Make a  goal of becoming that which we could become.

We could be slimmer, healthier, have long  or short hair. We cannot be shorter or taller (without high heels) unless we photo shop.

In other words, before deciding on any goal, make sure it is realistic. If it’s not realistic, call it a dream, not a goal. Dreams are great too, as long as we know they are dreams and we understand a time would come when we would have to wake up and… make a goal.



Long Term GOALS!!! Are They Good, Bad… or WHAT?????

When I was escaping Communist Romania, many years ago, on my way to “freedom,” I traveled in the same train compartment with a small, grey-haired woman whose eyes spoke the wisdom of age and  life experience.

I thought, at the time, she “bought” my lie, that I was just going on a trip to what was at the time West Germany. As I look back I am questioning my “know it all” attitude that most young people have, myself included.

We had a long train ride, and she gave me plenty of advice. I forgot most of it, but very time life throws an unexpected obstacle my way, I remember her words:

“Don’t make very long plans. They almost never work!”

Well, I thought, what did she know? I sure knew MY future, MY GOALS, it was ALL planned!!!

I will not write this post about how many times I had to change the course of my planned to perfection life, or how I ended up changing at least 6 professions to survive the changes around me. If those details, and life lessons interest you, please read the first 100 posts of this blog.

The PURPOSE of this post is to share with you that while it is great to plan, have goals, many times circumstances beyond OUR control happen and derail our initial goals. Just like a train… do you fall off the tracks or get back your balance and stay in the course of life?  

Perhaps, a wise suggestion would be to learn to take the small steps that lead to a long-term goal. If life throws your way obstacles, YOU do not have the power to change them. However, YOU have the power to be flexible and CONTROL your attitude.

This is the gift we were given by a Higher Power, the freedom of choice and control over ourselves and our choices. No One else’s!

My goal, when I escaped communism, was to have freedom of speech. To write a book and be allowed to say jokes about political figures and not go to jail!

Ultimately, I wrote a book, I am blessed with you, my readers, and the privilege to share with you… but ON THE WAY… I was faced with six changed of professions, single motherhood, suicide loss… and more. EVERY time something negative happened, what saved me was FLEXIBILITY and understanding that most times life’s road is not straight, but winding and if you don’t follow the bends… oh well…

In conclusion goals are great as long as they are accompanied by flexibility and the wisdom that we could only change us.