Why Death Brings Us Closer To Life and GOD!

  1. imageimagePopular wisdom has it that we could not truly understand an event which we didn’t personally experience. While this truth is debatable, if one wishes to question it, one could. I belong to the group which is in agreement. The reason is simple: I know first hand  that experiencing something on a personal level made me a  better prepared listener and overall helper.

An example:

As a confused young mother I went to consult a psychologist. The first question I asked him was, “Do you have children?”  At the time, I didn’t have a Master’s in Clinical Psychology and didn’t know  there were many “schools of thought,” one of which was Freudian, and one of its basic principles was for the therapist to act detached, as a “blank wall.” When he refused to answer, I simply stood up and left the room.

Looking back from the perspective of a ature woman who raised two children and chose to try and understand the winding path of the human mind for as long as I could remember, I  admit  my first  “qualifying” question should have been, “Have you helped other parents with this type of issues,” or, ” Have you had specialized training in this area?”

Why didn’t I ask those questions? I could come up with many answers but the truth is parenting two children, twenty two months apart, had nothing to do with logic and a lot to do with emotions and the need to be validated, understood and  reassured that what I FELT was “normal.”  I was not the only  mother to feel  confused after a sleepless night,  that the focus of my universe  shifted from ME to THEM, my daughters, and no matter how much I wished to  shift it back to what it  used to be, that was unlikely to happen! Little by little, with the help of  my mothers’ neighborhood support group, we, together re-balanced our lives to fit the needs of our newly created “Suns” and “Stars.”

If you are still reading this article, you might ask yourself, where is she going with this…the title suggests death bringing us closer to life, not thoughts on motherhood!

If that’s what you are thinking, you couldn’t be closer to the truth, yet further from it!

They say, we are our thoughts but let’s explore what happens when what we take for granted, our capacity to think clearly, vanishes!!!

Close your eyes, take a deep breathe in and an even deeper breathe out and imagine… your brain as a shinny golden bubble, inside,  there are small drawers and by God’s design, we know which drawer to open  when and let out the right letters which instinctively know how to form the right words to take the correct actions at the most appropriate time.

Let’s go back to “what is the connection between motherhood and the title:

I chose the task of mothering as an example, because in my experience, there is no other more complex task in the world and it involves opening and closing so many drawers, I am in awe of all the millions of mothers who manage to juggle lives keeping some kind of order in their unique “bubbles,” as the balance of their Universe changed forever from “ME to THEM!

To accomplish this most difficult task of  motherhood, our brain, our “bubble,” must be kept functional.

Now imagine, without a cautionary sign, the very mechanism which controls our actions,  is shuttered! It happens so fast, you don’t know it is happening. Your “control panel,” doesn’t age slowly, it doesn’t change from gold to silver or cooper or rusts…It’s not one drawer which refuses to open, or some open, some don’t or they open half-way letting out meaningless crumbs.

In that moment, my world exploded! NO brain, no thoughts, only a billion pieces of particles, letters which desperately tried to get together and form words, meaning, to communicate! Instead, they floated around disoriented, unable to make a decision: Which way to look? 

I was having a stroke!

I sat at the edge of reality not certain whether I should look down, in the sewer or up to the stars.

The sewer was closer, I could smell the odor of my own human despair and there was no fear, as I had no thoughts and all was instinct.

I was on the edge and my comfort zone was to let go and dive in the unknown, walk on the shifting sands and sink deeper and deeper until I were no more…

In that crucial moment, it wasn’t my brain, as there was none, that ordered me to look up and  TRUST!

God was not done with me in this dimension, we call life! I didn’t THINK IT, I KNEW IT!

I trusted, looked up where GOD told me to look and live to tell  how it feels to have a stroke and  I ask you to trust in God and always look up!

Author’s note:

This is a true story.

On September 19, 2016 I had a stroke. They say, when it comes to strokes, “TIME IS BRAIN!”  My symptoms started as I was driving down a familiar road and I wondered why, at 2:30 PM on a Monday, there were so many bad drivers on the road. I barely drove myself home but when I tried to get out of the car, I fell. My neighbors and friends ran towards me and I attempted to tell them I needed help but although in my rapidly deteriorating “bubble,” words were forming, they didn’t come out, just sounds of despair.  They were enough and my neighbor took me to the hospital which was 5-minutes away from y home.  The right side of my face was already paralyzed. I WAS BROUGHT INTO THE Emergency Room 20 minutes from when my symptoms started. Because of the timely arrival, the doctors were able to use a clot buster called tPA.  Following the procedure I was in Intensive care for three days. 


I hope if you read this article to the end, you see the connection and why




They say, “TIME IS BRAIN,” to underline the importance of getting to an Emergency Room as soon as symptoms start!

Before Monday, I believed this statement to be true . Now, I know it is true and essential if you want the symptoms reversed completely and your life back as it was before the STROKE!

It is my hope that this story, written through the eyes of someone who suffered an acute stroke on Monday, and is writing this post on Thursday, will help someone, somewhere, go for help as soon as symptoms start!

I believe that we all know the symptoms, which have been repeated over and over in a zillion forwarded emails and posts. I also know that now, that I experienced a stroke, NOT all of the symptoms I remembered were present, but the ones who were present were overwhelming and scary, so scary, that I could understand why one would not want to believe something so terrible is happening to them and would want to wait.

I was driving to an appointment on a road I knew well, yet, it seemed narrower than I remembered it, as the cars coming from the opposite direction seem to come towards me. I wondered why there were so many bad rivers on the road! I was going in 20 miles a hour and the engine was making a funny noise… or perhaps  the noise was in my head? Something was wrong, I knew it, but didn’t know what.

Instead of going to my appointment, I went home listening to my gut feeling and not to my brain which was telling me I should not miss my appointment!

I barely made it in front of my house, and stopped the car in the middle of the road, blocking traffic!

Thankfully, my friends and neighbors, Jessica and Aram were  on the porch.

I sat there, in the driver’s seat, in the middle of the road,  disoriented.

Not that I remember the events, but they told me later what happened…

What I DO remember, is that my friends came to the car’s window and I wanted to tell them something was wrong. When I  tried to articulate my thoughts, which were clear in my head,  my words came out  slurry, and I had no control over them!

I felt as if I was in a bubble, and the words were forming just right inside the bubble, but when I wanted to push them through the walls of the bubble, somehow, they had a mind of their own, were not listening to me anymore. I tried to stand up, but my entire body felt like jello and I fell back on the seat!


“I HAVE A STROKE! PLEASE TAKE ME TO THE HOSPITAL NOW! I asked Aram, and off we drove!

Pinnacle Harrisburg Campus is 5 minutes away from our home and we arrived in the Emergency Room only 15 minutes from when I noticed the symptoms.

So… now we were in the E.R. of a major hospital!






I was lucky Aram stayed with me and “translated” the mambo jumbo” coming out of my mouth. One non-medical employee uttered the opinion that I might speak like that because I had an accent. Aram assured  the person I was a well-educated person, who published a  book, and I speak English fluently when I AM MYSELF.



At last, I was in a  hospital room  in admissions, and all I remember is a crowd of medical professionals assessing me and my effort to spit out words and all that came out were letters flying in every which direction and refusing to form the words  I ordered!




Dr. O. Agbe- Davies,  a Pinnacle neurologist, entered the  exam room, and as out of it as I was, I do remember he had a cool bow tie! He saved my life!

I was thirsty.  My lips were cracked, my throat on fire. I bargained for a sip of water, even a swabs soaked in water, but none of my begging tricks worked! Now I understand it was for a good reason, as my stomach should have been empty in case a procedure was necessary.

After all my neurological exams failed to be normal Dr. Davis told me because I came immediately after the symptoms started I was a candidate for a powerful clot buster,  tPA. This miracle medication COMPLETELY REVERSED MY SYMPTOMS! 

Thanks to the many factors that worked together, a miracle happened and I am myself again, resting at home and writing this post because I feel, if ONE person goes to the hospital in time to reverse all the symptoms,  I didn’t waste my time.

This is a story written  after I stepped into my LIFE again, after  the confining bubble I experienced while having an ACUTE STROKE was busted by the miracle medication, tPA!

I am taking this opportunity to thank Dr. Davis and the wonderful staff in the Intensive Care Unit of Pinnacle Harrisburg Hospital.

I am also thankful for Aram, who took me to the hospital and helped  the hospital staff decipher the  mambo jumbo coming out of my mouth, and Jessica and her dad, who picked me up on discharge.

I am thankful for my friend Melissa, who on her birthday, went to feed my dogs and African Grey, and Dee, who helped with the entire operation of entering my house.

Oh! I forgot to mention, Duke is a guard dog, and no one dares enter his territory, so  feeding them and letting them out was a complex operation which required courage!

Thank you also to my friends  Christine and the Martins  for always being so thoughtful.










OVERWHELMED!!! How to “overwhelm,” feeling “overwhelmed.”

Who hasn’t felt overwhelmed?

Perhaps, at times, we are so overwhelmed, we don’t recognize it. As a popular saying states, “we can’t SEE the forrest because of the trees!” We are in The picture, how could we SEE it? We are too close!

How do we define overwhelmed?  Honestly, as with everything else, perception is WHAT defines this emotion, as well.

I would describe such a feeling as lack of direction. When I feel there is so much food on my plate, I simply cannot eat it all, nor do I know where to start, but I must and am confused and feel helpless!

Common sense would tell me to start with the healthy foods and either eat less or not at all, the unhealthy ones. WHAT about everything is healthy and necessary?

How would the above statement translated to our lives?

DO WHAT is vital for your life, THE NEEDS, First, and leave the “wants” last.

Prioratize in writing. Scientific Research determined that if we write our worries, we become less worried.

At times, it might be hard to SEE the difference between “needs,” and “wants.” Here are a few examples:

I know it’s boring, but for most people, needs are: a roof over our heads, clothing in agreement with the season, food, basic cleaning supplies for self and our home.

Paying our utilities, electricity, water, gas, phone, are also needs on my list. Having enough money to pay them, would definitely make me feel less overwhelmed. Let’s continue our list of priorities, needs and wants.

Health is a huge priority for me, as without Health one has nothing! Unfortunately, if one doesn’t have good Health Insurance, one is doomed at looking from the outside at the many new, life-saving drugs and procedures which are not available without good insurance.

In fact, currently, Medicare is in the process of ” experimenting”  trying to determine what’s good for ITS members,  a decision which, in my opinion, should be yours and your doctors!

Good Insurance premiums ( Health, car, homeowners or renters)  are all boring priority! In fact, if we review the list, everything in the needs list is boring, absolutely necessary and requires MONEY!!! Also, all of these needs are FIX expenses! By the time we pay the fix expenses and get to food, another NEED, we might feel so overwhelmed, we might give up or throw up!

This is  a choice…

I will go on:)

After we are done prioratizing our needs, and assuming we have enough money left, there are many choices of wants.

Personally, I’d go for a massage and meeting a friend for a meal and most importantly, good company! I’d invest in some good essential oils which help with anxiety. I’d schedule walks with a friend, three times a week! WOW! Please note this is FREE, but you must buy the shoes!

At last… But not least, BREATHE!!!

This post is just touching the surface of discussing a complex emotion, which affects many of us.

As most of you know, from writing to me on other topics, I write this blog as Community service. I don’t have the financial wealth to pay a Church 10 percent of  my income, if I did, my fix expenses would go unpaid… So helping others, around The WORLD, is my contribution.

Feel Free to write privately or comment.

“Ask and you shall receive” an answer from me:)

Rodica Mihalis, M.S.

Counseling and Clinical Psychology

The Truth About Being A Single Woman!

imageWith divorce rates at least at 50/50 percent it could be safely assumed that there are a lot of single people on our Planet at the present time. I will only share some thoughts about single women because my divorce was final in 2005 so I feel I could speak like a “pro” on the topic.

There could be a multitude of scenarios but they say to speak about what you know best.
For that reason, I will speak about the truth regarding single womanhood as I experience it!

There is a popular belief that one couldn’t forget or “heal” and place an old love on the back shelf of our hearts, unless a new Prince Charming appears in our lives, white horse or not.
Truth be told, if I didn’t have a Master’s in counseling and Psychology and years of sitting on the client ‘s chair, because how could one support a client if she/ he has never been one?
The story of my romantic relationships started early in my life, for strictly practical reasons:
I believed in love and my mother believed in being sexually active only if married! The result was that at 18, I eloped with my high school sweetheart and we got married!
Contrary the common belief, our marriage lasted about 14 years but ended tragically with my first love fathering a son with a coworker, while I was trying to find a job and bring him from then communist Romania to the United States.
This was the first time when I questioned my ability to tell truth from lies and TRUST!It took me about a year of emotional confusion and pain but then, I threw myself in the deep pond of dating in America! There were lot of fishes of all forms and ages!
My singlehood, as I define it now was rather a game of choosing my next male partner. To be honest, since my first love already divorced me and married the mother of his son, I felt kind of a biological competition, with my clock ticking strongly, as I was now in my thirstiest!
Tick tock, tick tock, after dating a few already scarred men, recovering themselves from failed marriages, I met the one, who came not on a hoarse, but in a talking car!
We dated about two years, which I believe showed maturity on our side and then we got married, had two lovely kids, several pets… We were living the American Dream!
We lived it for almost 20 years, until one day, I opened a letter from the IRS and discovered my rock, my husband holding an MBA in finances was behind paying taxes! Not a good situation and suddenly, I fell from atop my comfort zone all the way down in the arms of confusion and uncertainty!
Unlike the first time, now I had the responsibility of two teen children and several pets!
The years 2004 and 2005, described in my book, “The Gypsy Saw Two Lives,” as “The Year From Hell,” detail the Hellish situation, but the goal of this post remains to detail what truly means to be a single woman and become self- sufficient and know thyself before jumping in the pond again and repeating the same mistakes!
2005– I was divorced, my daughters moved as far from tragedy and me as the length of the USA permitted! In the minds of most of today’s adult children, as a mother, I had to be proud I raised self- sufficient, educated daughters who no longer needed my help. I was suggested to find another project since my two children turned so well, they no longer needed me! Again, the pain caused by such statements and the consequences will be the topic of other writing, and I am bringing myself back to WHAT it means to me a single woman!
This time, after my 2 ND divorce and all the education acquired, I knew I should know myself first before even considering a relationship.
What does this mean exactly?
A few practical examples first:
You have a flat tire on the highway, you call AAA not your ex.
A shelf in the house is crooked, you straightedge yourself, or you call a handyman at $20 an hour, if you find one!
You learn to mow the grass or pay for the service. If you need to go to the doctor you drive yourself and no one will be waiting worried sick about you!
Oh well, in all honesty while I was married I was still driving my self to the doctor and no one was worried! Perhaps this is why I divorced…
However, the point I am trying to make is that singlehood implies that you do not ask or expect help from any potentially romantic relationship or your ex.
To truly be ready, if ever, to trust again another human being, you have to first go through the stage of self-sufficiency and self-discovery!
However, singlehood it’s not all bad! You might discover people like you who love for who you are, make new friends and take up new hobbies.
After ten years of meditating and trying to understand my part in the relationships of the past, I feel ready to embark in exploring love, closeness but above it all: TRUST!
Let’s see what the future brings!

What’s In Your Refrigerator, Weekend Dish! Angel Hair / Vegetables Dish

Pasta/Vegis Weekend Dish

Pasta/Vegis Weekend Dish

Earlier in the day, I posted on my Facebook page a question: Could any of my friends suggest a recipe using ingredients they already had at hand. To be more specific, I listed WHAT I either grew in my garden, or in Had in my cupboard.
By dinner time, no one made any suggestions:( I was getting hungry…
Also I remembered it was the Weekend anyway, the time of the week when I post:

“What’s In YOUR Refrigerator Leftover Dish.”
Here it is:


Angel Hair Pasta. Cook in boiling water to which you added salt and oil.
2 eggs And 1 cup Almond milk ( original) — stir well together.

In a frying pan heat 1/2 cup coconut or olive oil.
1 onion
4-6 baby carrots or one large carrot ( if you have it in your refrigerator)
3-5 medium fresh tomatoes (skinned- please ask for details on how to peel the tomatoes’ skin)
Add any other fresh vegis you have: green beans, zucchini, etc.
Add salt and Pepper.
Sote these chopped vegis in the coconut oil.
Mix well the pasta, the eggs and Almond milk mixture and the soted vegis.
Place the well mixed pasta, vegis and Eggs/Almond milk in a buttered baking dish.

Preheat oven at 350 F degrees and bake for 30 minutes.
Everything is cooked already, so bake as long as you wish according to taste.
Add chopped, fresh basil.
I mix about 1/2 cup in Pasta/ vegis mixture before I bake, and 1/2 cup at the very end.

I consider fresh basil a miracle herb!
There is a Romanian “urban legend,” which claims that if a young woman (preferably a virgin) places under her pillow fresh basil, she will dream her future husband!!!
WOW!!! Wouldn’t that be nice:)
Meanwhile, just in case you don’t dream your Prince Charming, have seconds of the Angel Hair/ Vegis Dish!
It’s either delicious, or I was very hungry… or both!
After you make this dish, if you made any changes to make it yummier, please share with us!
Enjoy, and make enough so that everyone Could have seconds:)

FATE and Good Luck! Even Mice Have It!

The lucky baby mouse

The lucky baby mouse

Fate and good luck or the lack of it, reinforced by a Birthday on July 13th, turned into a life-long preoccupation. I wouldn’t go as far as calling it an obsession… Although, on a second thought, I do take Ambien…

WHAT really gets me is the extreme position that we control absolutely everything that happens to us, and as a result of this extreme belief, if you are Oprah you might feel like the Queen of no fate, and all self-brilliance, a half woman, half-Goddess who turns no matter WHAT into gold, platinum or Weight watcher valuable shared at least long enough to make a profit… But not ling term!
However, if you are like millions who work three jobs and could barely pay bills, while being fed the myth that YOU and you alone are responsible for your success of failure… You might not feel so great!
Studies show that if someone continues to repeat nonsensical positive affirmations which make no sense to our subconscious mind, that is damaging and may result in depression rather than success!
I will not comment on Ancient myths and thousands of years of wisdom, instead, to illustrate my point, I will share a simple story which happened to a baby mouse an hour ago!

In my sun-room there are several empty vases and when I noticed Duke, my boxer barking at a vase??? I put my glasses on to SEE WHAT was the fuss about!!!
At the bottom of the vase, a baby field mouse was running in circles calling his mommy!
In that moment, I forgot about the war I have declared on rodents regardless of size, shape, age, and when I saw that cartoonish baby mouse, scared and lonely, my motherly heart melted and I felt if I killed it, it would have been like murdering the innocent!

I took the vase with the baby mouse in it and FREED it far from the house.
I will not overthinking the complex topic of fate and luck, however could anyone deny this baby mouse was in a WAR zone, yet, the enemy, me, in the most irrational twist of FATE, FREED the enemy and felt good about irrational… YES!! TRUE? YES!!!

Following the story of the lucky baby mouse, my conclusion was that there fate and good luck and bad luck are REAL and while we are in control of some of WHAT happens to us, we are not in control of everything! Perhaps, this is when we need to PRAY TO GOD!

My baby mouse was lucky, and didn’t even repeat senseless positive affirmations, as we humans do
WHAT do you think? Are you in total control? In no control? A combination? Please share with us!
Rodica M.

Weekend Leftovers Dish—What’s in Your Refrigerator?

Rodica's Weekend recipe

Rodica’s Weekend recipe

One of the many blessings of summer, especially if you live on the East Coast of the US or Europe, or any place where you experience four seasons, is the richness of fruits and vegetables gifted us by Mother Nature in July, August may be the beginning of September.

Growing your own vegetables and fruits guarantees they are truly organic and no pesticides had been used.
There are a few vegetables and fruits which truly are so self-sufficient, I am embarrassed to call myself a gardner on the grounds that I really worked hard on making them grow from seeds to lavish vegetables or berries!
I guess the word “tend” would be more appropriate because all they need is to be placed in ground, covered with healthy, fertile earth, not too deep and allowing space between seedlings, make sure you water them and… wait, and wait some more until a miracle happens, enormous vines with huge leaves and yellow flowers start crowling everywhere in your garden! If like me, you know nothing about gardening, you too will learn by mistake! Zuccini, cucumbers are not going to jump at you:) when they are ripe!
They hide under the leaves, so you will have to go on the expedition of lifting the leaves and picking them up when they are ripe but NOT overdone!

Okay, this weekend’s recipe contains some vegis from my garden, zuccini, courtesy of
my friend Melissa, some baby carrots, which sat lonely in my refrigerator, because I don’t like them raw… etc Too much explaining already! Here is the recipe:

1-2 medium zucchini- chopped, washed, not peeled
8-10 baby carrots
1 chopped onion
2-3 cloves of garlic, chopped
Kernels from 2 corn on the cob
Fresh basil- chopped
Chiched- cubed ( mine was already cooked, dark meat)
Coconut oil


In a large pan, heat the oil and sote the onions, garlic, add all vegis, chicken cubbes and S & P
Not the basil.
Do not cook completely but stir so they are omogenous.
Turn oven at 400 degrees F
On a greased tray place all ingredients in single layer and bake for 20 minutes Check often, because it burns quickly. Add the fresh basil at the end!
I think it would be more delicious grilled!
As in life, be flexible, think out of the box, improvize and enjoy even if what turns out is not exactly what you expected but still delicious!
Serve hot with toasted bread of your choice.

Please share your recipes and thoughts.
If you wish to receive tips on a variety of life practical topics, join us by subscribing free to http://www.thenudetruth.com

Rodica Mihalis MS
Counseling and Clynical Psychology
“Pretend” Chef:)

Cucumber As Food And Beauty Mask!

Cold cucumber/yogurt soup
Cucumber is one of my favorite vegetables because we could use it to make delicious cool soups in the summer, but also use it as a main ingredient for an easy, inexpensive facial mask which is excellent for all skin types!
In other words cucumbers are good as a yummy healthy food but also as a beauty aid!
It doesn’t get any better than this!

One thing at a time, First, The soup. I am Greek on my Father’s side and still hope to have a chance to rediscover my roots some day and possibly find that treasure my grandfather told us he burried under an Olive tree. I After My divorced, I Even changed My name to Mihalis, to attrackt The energy necessary to visit Greeace, but I guess the energy is taking ITS time to manifest:)

Meanwhile, my friend, Sandy, gave me a taste of the deliciousness of Mediteranian food, by teaching me how to make this easy And awesome cucumber cold soup!
Cold Cucumber Yogurt Soup


2 medium cucumbers ( remove seeds)
One container of large kGreek yogurt
1/2 cup sour cream
1/4 cup chopped fresh dill
1-2 closes garlic
1/2 red onion sliced to ornate ( I use mint and basil)
S & P to taste
1/4 tsp tarragon (optional)
Mint (optional)
Some people use 1/4 Olive oil, but I never did and never will.
In a blender mix cucumbers, yogurt, dill, garlic.
Remove from blender and in a bowl to the cucumber yogurt mixture add sour cream and all or some of the herbs above depending on availibility and taste.
Chill for 5-8 hours and serve with toasted rye bread and fruit. In summer time, not being an entuziast drinker of plain water, to plain water I add: fresh mint, basil leaves, lemon and a tbs. of row honey.
Okay… This is soup and it makes a delicious lunch!

Cucumber Facial Mask For All Skin Types

1/2 cucumber, pured
1 Tbs yogurt

How to prepare: pure the cucumber and mix with the yogurt. Keep refrigerated in a glass container.
How to use: place all over face, not on eye lids. Keep on for 15 minutes and wash with luke warm water. On your eyes you could place two round slices of cold cucumbers and imagine you are in a TV commercial for some fancy Spa!
The lactic acid in yogurt will also gently exfoliate and moisturize your skin.
Plain yogurt has been used for years as an anti burns natural remedy. It works!

Variations to this mask:
Cucumber pured and 1 tbs. honey ( which helps with skin elasticity)
Or cucumber and 1 Tbs. aloe vera gel which is a great moisturizer and healing agent.

Aloe Vera plants are a must in every household.
They require little water and care and give back more than we give them.
If you split an Aloe leaf, you coud use the gel inside as an ingredient in facial masks, to help heal burns or mixed with a favorite juice as a refreshing drink!

This is all for today!
We are in the mist of a heat wave!
Stay cool and sip your cucumber soup while beautifying your skin.
Well… May be one at a time would be more relaxing!

Please feel free to comment, share, ask question publicly or privately ( rodimihalis@ gmail.com)
Reminding you, this is My service to The WORLD community. I do it free in hopes we Could make this WORLD a better place, one small step at a time!

Rodica Mihalis M.S.
Clinical Psychology
And Licensed Esthetician

The VALUE of Timing in Everthying We Do!

It is not the first time when gardening teaches me unexpected valuable lessons at exactly the right time!

Being the “sharing type” that most of you know I am, here is WHAT I learned this morning from the simple activity of trying to discover if any of my cucumbers were ripe!
Well… The Lesson number one, was that cucumbers grow hidden under leaves and if you, like me, just look superficially and dont take the time and effort to “discover” the cucumbers hidden under the large leaves… well, I have bad news for us:
they will grow and grow and at some point become overly ripe, bitter and useless.
As in life, waiting TOO LONG could cost us a lost opportunity!
This is the VALUE of timing in everything and it needs to be recognized, valued and respected in all our actions!
Our success depends in a large part on TIMING! Let’s not ignore ITS power but instead use it to our advantage!
Let’s now take a life situation and try to apply the value of timing…
WHAT should we choose, as timing is of importance in the smallest action we take in our daily lives.
Since we all were faces at one time of another with the pain of loosing a love relationship, let’s ask ourselves: was the break really a total surprize, or somewhere in our subconscious mind we knew the truth, but were afraid to knee down, touch the leaves and discover the overly ripen “problem,” which sooner or later made its presence in our life anyway, on its own time!
Would it have been better to disciver the problem before it revealed itself and it was too late?
It takes courage to first admit there is something hidden which sooner or later will affect us negatively. To actually bring up WHAT we know in our subconscious mind to the consciousness and take action, whatever that may be, is not only courageous but it shows dignity!
Well, going back to my overly ripe cucumber, I tasted it, but it was so bitter, I had to through it away… I hate waist!
How many times we do the same with our relatiobships? We know they didn’t work the first time, yet we bite again into the bitterness of certain failure and the pain that follows!
Timing… When to hang on to something and when to let go? When do we look under the leaves which hide the truth, and when do we ignore until The Truth finds us, because IT will!

The good news is that these could be lessens learned!!!
WHAT I learned in gardening is to check under the leaves often, so I could find the cucumbers in TIME and enjoy the deliciousness of this versatile vegetable!

As far as timing in relationships goes… I am still trying to find a formula that works, but so far, no success.
Please share your stories and how timing worked in your favor or not…

When your social security benefit was miscalculated, does social security owe you money retroactively? This is a TRUE story!

It is Wednesday, June 29th, 2016 and reluctantly I read through my mail.
Generally, it’s not a joyful event, as most of the letters are bills and statements or notices.
This time, it was different: A letterhead from Social Security caught my attention to the point that I searched in my purse and put on my reading glasses.

The letter informed me that my old benefit was “incorrect,” and beginning in July I will start receiving the correct amount, which was by a $100.00 more than the old benefit. My first reaction was joy! What an unexpected gift and birthday present.
Then, I started to process this great news:

When was this error discovered?
Is social security legally responsible for back pay?
If so, how much is the retroactive amount owed me?
Perhaps there is no retroactive pay, and I should just shut up and be grateful I will receive more money!

If anyone wonders, social security benefits, are not a GIFT, but an amount calculated considering my years of work and if disability and spousal benefits are involved, all those years of hard work and payments go into calculating your benefit.

$100.00 to me represents almost the amount I spend on food monthly, as I have to be on a tight budget. As they say, one person’s trash is somebody else’s treasure,” many might spend $100 on dinner and think it’s cheap, but for me $100 is a significant amount.

As I was still processing this unexpected positive event, decided the best way to get an accurate response to my questions, would be to CALL THE SOCIAL SECURITY OFFICE.

Yesterday, June 30, 2016 I did. After the customary 10-15 minutes “on hold” Mr. Pham answered the phone and I explained the reason of my call. As it is customary, Mr. Pham asked me:

What is your Date of Birth? and in the same sentence, without giving me a chance to answer, assumed I did NOT know what he meant he added: “THAT MEANS, WHEN WERE YOU BORN!”

Mr. Pham, just because I have an accent you assume I don’t comprehend simple questions?
I popped in my mouth a Lisinopril pill to make sure my blood pressure was under control, and continued to be civilized.

It turned out, Mr. Pham didn’t have an answer to any of my questions. He put me on hold and spoke with his superiors.
After a few long minutes and an appology, which made me feel like a human being again, he said:
Sorry for the long wait. All I could do is forward your inquiry to our Payment Center, but they may, or MAY NOT answer you!”

“Is this department above the law? Do they have the option to answer or not answer, if the question is inconvenient?

It was a simple question: “How was the error discovered, and am I owed retroactive payments!”

As I continue to research this topic, I thought I’d share with you all, but this is ONLY the beginning…
Stay tuned. There is more coming!
As always, I invite you to share your stories, comment and subscribe to our FREE email feed, so that you keep informed on the many topics we post, and which have the PURPOSE TO IMPROVE YOUR DAILY LIVES!
God bless!
Have a Happy 4th of July!
Rodica M.